• 6:11 PM, 13.7.08
rahrahrah. i just realised i really don't like being the one who initates conversations. i hate talking to someone then getting brushed off like something insignificant. or even worse when they like hint to you that they have better things to do then talk to you. and you'll be left feeling veh awkward there. so you just have to do your best to salvage what's left of your pride and try to make a graceful exit, but often failing. because you'll get so flustered and screw up.

this applies to like both sms and msn yo. actually i'd prefer total silence if they'd really don't wanna talk to you.
then at least they don't have to think of an excuse to not talk to you and the whole awkward setting disappears. and it happened not only once, but twiceeee in a row. gosh, i must really suck for people to hate talking to me that much.

i guess it's actually for the best? no one wanna talk to me then i will study more efficiently. (yeah right, as if i'll study in the first place -.-) or maybe i can go write the speech now haha. emo kid can write emo speech then make everyone cry during ORD.

oh, who am i kidding. i don't even think i have the right to stand on that stage and give everyone a speech about NPCC given my ponning record. i mean, besides that, if i can't even make one single person listen to me talk. what makes you think that i can make an entire unit listen to me give a frigging speech?

aye, whatever. not as if people will read my blog anyway. spammage of emoness. whyyyyy like this. i don't wanna be emo damnit. cheerupcheerupcheerupcheerup! i tell people to cheerup when i ownself depressed like shizz. hypocrite leh amanda. super hypocrite. i hate hypocrites! amanda, i hate you. >:

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